Hei, jeg heter Erik og jeg er avhengig.
Jeg er på kjøret igjen. Skikkelig på kjøret. Det er snart 10 år siden jeg trodde jeg hadde klart å legge det på hylla for godt.
“Jeg skal jo bare ha litt. Jeg bare må ha det. Jeg klarer jo å slutte igjen.”
Det har gått mer enn 14 dager siden jeg sa dette til meg selv og jeg er offisielt på kjøret igjen. I flere år gikk jeg rundt med merker i lomma. Alle jeansene mine hadde hvite flekker med 5 cm mellomrom som tydelig markerte starten og slutten på det kjære dopets faste plass i lomma. Akkurat som snusere som har runde hvite flekker i jeansen etter snusboksen.
“Bare i dag funker jo fint”, sa jeg til meg selv. “Jeg kaster den igjen i morgen. Seriøst! Hvem blir avhengig av noe sånt?”
Yeah, right. 14 dager og jeg er mer avhengig enn noen gang. Snart ser du meg gå fra Narvesen til Narvesen for å skjule mitt enorme forbruk. Helvete er offisielt i gang.
Det er jo ikke akkurat sånn at det finnes flust av avvenningsklinikker for sånne som meg. Med god støtte fra venner og familie skal jeg nok klare det denne gangen også. Det blir en kamp. En kamp mot tørre lepper.
Lypsylen skal overvinnes.
Erik Windahl Olsen er gründer og daglig leder i IT-bedriften
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